Eoin had his second guitar lesson today. On the way to the lesson I asked him if he preferred me to be in the room with him or stay in the waiting area. His response was "I would like you to stay in the waiting room because then I have things to tell you about when I am done". He seems to be really enjoying it so far and was excited that with the three chords he now knows his instructor will begin helping him learn songs to play. He is just cute as a button carrying his guitar to the car, into the studio and back again. It is quite clear that he doesn't want any help with it.
These lessons are the first thing he has done independent of his brothers that is just for him. He is on different sports teams but usually we go as a family to practices or games and his brothers, at least one of them, will be playing the same sport on a different team. It is great to be able to spend time with just him in the car chatting. Chris and I don't insist that they spend time together but they usually want to be together. The odd time one will want to stay home with Gramma or Papa but usually if one offers to come somewhere with me then they all usually come with me. They even want to come with me to my hair appointments and sit playing with the toys or reading over the hour and a half it takes sometimes. Although the draw to that one is that they enjoy playing with the big duplo blocks that they may normally feel they are too old to play with. They often stay home with my parents so it is not that they can't be away from me, they choose to be with one another so where one goes the others follow. In fact they will push me out the door sometimes earlier than I need to leave just to be away from me.
They are very close. It is interesting how some people comment on this and view it positively and others seem to find fault with it thinking they are too attached to one another. My mother has mentioned that a few different friends have thought it odd that they share a room. We don't intend on giving them each their own bedroom. We simply don't have the space to give them each a bedroom and they haven't asked to have their own rooms. There is enough space in our home that if they need space they can find it easily enough. Sometimes when one is fed up with the noise on a tired night he will ask to sleep in our room or the spare room but usually there is no complaint. In fact even when they each go in a separate sleeping space then at some point two or all three end up together cuddling again. Liam in particular loves to be next to one of his brothers when he sleeps.
I would describe them as inseparable. When I hear about siblings being inseparable I think of it positively. I would not have imagined that it could have been seen as a negative. It has been expressed to me that maybe I not use that term as people may think it is not healthy. Apparently there are people who take that literally and think it means they cannot forge relationships outside of their threesome.
They are shy children but they come from a father who was also shy as a child. I wonder sometimes if they would be more outgoing if they had gone to school but then I just need to take one look at Chris and remember where they came from. I am sure they would know more children had they been in school. I am not confident that they would be better for it. Different but not better. I remind myself that there are many children who go to school are also shy, who do not have many friends and some sadly none at all. I notice others sometimes looking closely at the boys behaviours and seeing them through "they are homeschooled" glasses rather than just seeing them for who they are and realizing that one part of their lives happens to be that they are homeschooled. I find myself doing it sometimes so it is difficult to call others on it.
Despite being a little more timid they can all speak to other children and are capable of making friends. Seamus in particular enjoys spending time with his friends and going out on sleep overs. Liam and Eoin have expressed a desire to find a way to make more friends and I am confident that will come in the next few years. We have responded by choosing an activity that is more social than sports to give them the opportunity to interact with kids their own age and create more meaningful connections. The deeper connections came for Seamus at 10 years old and I have a feeling that it will follow the same general pattern with the other two. As their parents we ensure that they have access regularly to other children and adults with whom they may develop deeper relationships with. The rest is up to how people click and who they choose to connect with. Right now they click really well with each other and I am not going to complain. How many parents do you hear saying "my kids get along too well."? I am okay with having the three musketeers!
No comments:
Post a Comment